If ever there were a case study in how to take a potentially delightful hotel and run it with the precision of a student house share, this is it. One might almost call it “5-star chic” — all the trappings, none of the substance. The Gen Z clientele clearly adore it: Instagrammable corners aplenty, and management that seems equally committed to the principle of style triumphs over functioning safes, clean cups, or replenished tea bags.
Housekeeping demonstrated admirable consistency in never once replacing towels correctly or noticing that cups still bore evidence of prior adventures. Truly, one must admire such dedication to minimalism.
The fire alarm one morning was a masterclass in nonchalance. Should there ever be a genuine blaze, I feel confident we would ascend not via the fire stairs, but straight to the heavens — a unique check-out experience, if you will.
And then there’s the 3am to 5am entertainment — a thoughtful addition for those who tire of mere sleep. When the local nightclubs close, the hotel very generously transforms into a kind of open-plan dormitory experiment, complete with corridor duels, balcony courtships, and the dulcet tones of nocturnal revelers. A true community spirit.
In short, if you’ve ever wondered what would happen if a college dorm won the lottery and bought itself a chandelier, this is your answer